Lily was bragging to her publisher one day, “You know, I know everyone there is to know. Just name someone, anyone, and I bet I will know them.”
Skeptical of Lily’s boast, her publisher called her bluff, “Okay, Lily, how about George Clooney?”
“No dramas, George and I are old friends, and I can prove it.”
So Lily and her publisher fly out to Hollywood and knock on George Clooney’s door, and when George answers the door he shouts, “Lily! What’s happening? Great to see you! Come in, you’re just in time for a glass of wine. Amal and I have just opened a bottle of Napa Valley red.”
Although impressed, Lily’s publisher is still dubious about Lily’s boast. After they leave Clooney’s house, he tells Lily that he thinks her knowing George was just a lucky coincidence.
“No, no, just name anyone else,” Lily says.
“President Obama,” her publisher quickly retorts, confident that Lily couldn’t possibly know the president of the United States.
“Yup,” Lily says, “Old buddies, let’s fly out to Washington.”
Off they go. At the White House, Obama spots Lily on the tour and motions her and her publisher over, saying, “Lily, what a surprise, I was just on my way to a meeting, but you and your friend come on in to the Oval Office and let’s have a wine first and catch up.”
Well, Lily’s publisher is very shaken by now but still not totally convinced. After they leave the White House grounds he expresses his doubts to Lily, who again implores him to name anyone else.
“Pope Francis,” her publisher replies.
“Sure!” says Lily. “I’ve known the Pope for years.”
So off they fly to Rome. Lily and her publisher are assembled with the masses in St. Peter’s Square when Lily says, “This will never work. I can’t catch the Pope’s eye among all these people. Tell you what, I know all the guards so let me just go upstairs and I’ll come out on the balcony with the Pope.”
Lily disappears into the crowd headed towards the Vatican. Sure enough, half an hour later Lily emerges with the Pope on the balcony, but by the time Lily returns to St Peter’s Square to find her publisher, she discovers he’s had a heart attack and is surrounded by paramedics.
Making her way to her publisher’s side, Lily asks him, “What happened?”
Her publisher looks up and says, “It was the final straw… you and the Pope came out on to the balcony and the man next to me said, ‘Who the hell is that on the balcony with Lily?’
LOL, hope it gave you a giggle!